Happy Pi Day/White Day/Purim/Albert Einstein's birthday/release of Gankutsuou Vol. 3/birthday to me!

Ahahahaha--the snow gods love me! There's like...a foot of snow today and it's still snowing. We got a call at 5:30 AM from the school's principal telling us it was a snow day, so I got my wish. :D The weather is craaazy. I'm lovin' it.

I can't believe I'm eighteen. Well, technically, I'm not eighteen until the fat lady sings 8:22 PM, but...eh, same difference. I feel no different, as per usual for birthdays. I swear, the thing I'm most looking forward to as an eighteen-year-old is YaoiCon. XD;; Hahaha, I feel like a terrible human being.

In related news, Nicole keeps telling me to be prepared for her gift, so I'm deathly afraid. >.> I hope it's not pr0n or something. o_o

I'm sooo tempted to buy Roya someone hardcore yaoi and have it sent to her their address. (Cross-outs for so said person will not know of my evil scheme). I don't want any yaoi myself, but I'd love to send it to someone else.

Anyway...er...yeah. Not much more to say for now. Friends are probably coming over relatively soon...

Happy Pi Day/White Day/Purim/Albert Einstein's birthday/release of Gankutsuou Vol. 3/birthday to me!

Ahahahaha--the snow gods love me! There's like...a foot of snow today and it's still snowing. We got a call at 5:30 AM from the school's principal telling us it was a snow day, so I got my wish. :D The weather is craaazy. I'm lovin' it.

I can't believe I'm eighteen. Well, technically, I'm not eighteen until the fat lady sings 8:22 PM, but...eh, same difference. I feel no different, as per usual for birthdays. I swear, the thing I'm most looking forward to as an eighteen-year-old is YaoiCon. XD;; Hahaha, I feel like a terrible human being.

In related news, Nicole keeps telling me to be prepared for her gift, so I'm deathly afraid. >.> I hope it's not pr0n or something. o_o

I'm sooo tempted to buy Roya someone hardcore yaoi and have it sent to her their address. (Cross-outs for so said person will not know of my evil scheme). I don't want any yaoi myself, but I'd love to send it to someone else.

Anyway...er...yeah. Not much more to say for now. Friends are probably coming over relatively soon...

Flatline

Well, my birthday's pretty much over, and I have no idea what to think of it. It didn't really feel like a birthday--it was just too...routine, in a sense, and like not much was actually going on. I was happy I got to spend some time with my friends, though, and...I don't know. I feel weird right now.

My emotions flared up yet again, so I've spent a lot of the day feeling like I'm in a suspended reality. I talked to a few of my friends about things, but I can't say I feel like I solved a lot. It might have, but I felt so bad asking them to do what I asked them to do, but...I couldn't bear it any more, holding it in.

I just...I disgust myself at how emotional I've become, and there are so many things that just don't seem to have a solution. It's lucky I'm so accustomed to being optimistic, because I do believe eventually everything will come full circle. It's just hard to wait for that day to come when you want so badly for everything to just be...without boundaries again, I guess. I used to have no inner conflicts, I used to be free, and now that I've allowed myself to become human, emotionally, I have to deal with the fact that I am flawed, I am relying on things other than myself to be happy, I am going to feel things that I cannot control.

This is not to say I've had a bad birthday or anything--it was fine, really, and if things continue the way they're going I'm going to be completely set for conventions money-wise. Almost everyone's getting me presents late, which I don't mind at all. ^^;

I'm going to go read more angsty SasuNaru fanfics, then go to bed. I'm tired. -_-;

Flatline

Well, my birthday's pretty much over, and I have no idea what to think of it. It didn't really feel like a birthday--it was just too...routine, in a sense, and like not much was actually going on. I was happy I got to spend some time with my friends, though, and...I don't know. I feel weird right now.

My emotions flared up yet again, so I've spent a lot of the day feeling like I'm in a suspended reality. I talked to a few of my friends about things, but I can't say I feel like I solved a lot. It might have, but I felt so bad asking them to do what I asked them to do, but...I couldn't bear it any more, holding it in.

I just...I disgust myself at how emotional I've become, and there are so many things that just don't seem to have a solution. It's lucky I'm so accustomed to being optimistic, because I do believe eventually everything will come full circle. It's just hard to wait for that day to come when you want so badly for everything to just be...without boundaries again, I guess. I used to have no inner conflicts, I used to be free, and now that I've allowed myself to become human, emotionally, I have to deal with the fact that I am flawed, I am relying on things other than myself to be happy, I am going to feel things that I cannot control.

This is not to say I've had a bad birthday or anything--it was fine, really, and if things continue the way they're going I'm going to be completely set for conventions money-wise. Almost everyone's getting me presents late, which I don't mind at all. ^^;

I'm going to go read more angsty SasuNaru fanfics, then go to bed. I'm tired. -_-;