(no subject)

[pacificpikachu]

There's a pretty good chance Tilly is going to have to go back to her foster home. It's really disappointing and I'm sad about it.

She's been great with my mom and I and Hana--playing, being sweet, even going to the dog park! She hasn't been destructive in the house and she's been quite well-behaved. She's been sleeping in my room every night, giving me kisses on the face in the morning, playing with Hana and having a great time in the dog pen.

But she is dead terrified of--and tries to attack--my brother. He was away at my dad's the first two days, and now that he's come back she freaks out and barks and lunges at him and tries to bite if he comes anywhere near. Last night and today I did some work with her and Ryan to try to fix this based off advice on the internet and my knowledge of dogs in general (forming a positive association with him, and other things), and while she'll get up to the point of accepting a treat from him if he's standing still, if he starts moving or talks too much or does anything she goes at him again.

Given adequate time to work with her, I could get her to where she likes him and isn't afraid of him. But he lives in this house, too, and what are we supposed to do with her in the meantime? Just exile her to a room? That doesn't seem fair. And then there's the question of whether she would do the same with Ryan's friends, other people who drop by, and so on...

We still have to talk to her foster mom about it so nothing is for certain, but I just feel really...upset about it, I guess. I've grown quite fond of her and some part of me, as irrational as it is, feels like I've failed her and I'm a bad person if I send her back and that the group won't give us another dog. I know that's probably not true at all--they'll understand that we've treated her well and this is just her issue for whatever reason--but I can't help but feel that way anyway. Maybe she's just supposed to be with her foster mom, Erin, because Erin is quite attached to her. I don't know.

Anyway, we'll see what happens. If she has to go back to her foster home, I guess I'll just have to go hunting for a dog again immediately. I want a dog for our family that I can bond with and stay with and take for walks with Hana and take to the dog park, and so on. I feel like I can't settle down and be content with things until I have that in my life. I know it's crazy. But that's just how I feel.

I just have to remind myself that when you adopt dogs, there's generally a "trial period" of two weeks anyway. If it doesn't work out, it just...doesn't work out, and you learn from that and it's all right.

I will admit--and this is going to sound like I'm making it up but I'm not--that there was just a tiny part of me the whole time that was unsure about Tilly though I can't pinpoint why, but it was covered up by the fact that I think she's a fantastic, sweet, fun, pretty dog.

Comments

[sammywhatammy]

Ooof, that's tough. How long would it plausibly take to teach her not to attack him?

CALL IN CESAR MILAN /runs to the phone

[pacificpikachu.livejournal.com]

Hmmm, it could be anywhere from five days to two weeks if we worked on it every day I would guess. But even then there's no guarantee she wouldn't go after other people who came in the house... I wish I could just keep her and work on training her, but for a number of reasons I don't think that's going to work out. Maybe if I had my own apartment or house or something, but I don't. :(

I wish Cesar could come help! That would probably eliminate the problem. I'm using things that he would probably use but obviously he's a lot better at it. I wish we could call in a behaviorist and all that but, again, I just don't think it's feasible.

[ylmik-wisty.livejournal.com]

Oh, wow. That's really a shame. D: And odd. If only not for that attack quirk! Wherever she goes, whether staying with you or back to the home, I hope her training goes well on stopping that behavior. @__@

[koyaaniisqatsi.livejournal.com]

Awh that's such a shame. D: I hope that, whatever happens, things work out. *hugs* ♥

[bahzi.livejournal.com]

>< That's really strange! Have you seen her reaction to other men yet, did her foster mom have a son/brother? *sigh* I'd like to say it's no one's fault, but someone much earlier in her life probably did something to her to cause that behavior. It's totally beyond your control though, you've been wonderful to her. At least it is a foster situation and not a shelter, so you know she'll be well cared for. It's hard to know what triggers these things, but it'll probably a lot of long term behavior modification training to remedy, and you can't very well keep them apart from each other all the time. ^^;

[pdutogepi.livejournal.com]

I'm sorry to hear that you're having some difficulties with her D:

[mei-san.livejournal.com]

aw man, that's too bad. But then you'd have to find the right dog and it takes time. You are no professional so you shouldn't feel bad about it at all (even if you are, there's no point feeling bad about it). Hope every works out. I guess that's the hard part about rescuing dogs. You kind of have to re-discipline them.

[hitchi.livejournal.com]

It's too bad that things didn't work out, but I'm sure this, like everything else, has happened for a reason. Now your trepidation is justified, and you'll have a chance to get an even better dog for you and your family. Best of luck with everything, and you didn't do anything wrong.

But, Tilly is a really cute name.

[ionneos.livejournal.com]

As a shocking revelation to no one, I have no idea what to say. I suck at this.

Everything will turn out fine, whichever way the dice wants to roll. As you said, who knows? Maybe this could all be chocked down to fate. It's possible that Tilly's supposed to stay with Erin. But, here's the thing...You were awesome. If you do end up having to give Tilly back, you should be proud that you did everything you could. I know that sounds horribly impossible, but I don't think you should feel so bad about it. Definitely no "failure."

Remember, if Tilly needs to leave, it just means that there's another dog out there that needs your help even more than she did. I doubt that will cure your depression, but...maybe put a band-aid on it? Yes? No?

Either way, a hug, prayer, and feather fly off in your general direction.