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Feb. 26th, 2009 12:28 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
pacificpikachuThings...will probably work out just fine, but they're stressing me out right now.
* Chemistry. Chemistry is going badly. I failed both the test and the lab exam miserably. I've done badly on all the quizzes. The labs have been going...sort of decent but not good either. I'm going to work as hard as I can on Chemistry over the weekend, but we have another test on Monday and I'm scared because if I fail this too, it's not good news. The material seems more manageable this time, but I'm still nervous because I don
It is so incredibly frustrating being an excellent student who suddenly feels she has no motivation to do anything... I mean, I got a B on the first semester of Chemistry (and it would have easily been an A except I worked too slowly on the final. It makes me feel so inferior, so unsuited to being a vet, and the fact that KK is doing so well makes me feel like I'm just being a burden and pitiful and a slacker when I ask for help and complain (and this is MY problem, not hers in the slightest). I don't know why I can't seem to do anything lately. It's not like doing homework is that incredibly difficult, but it feels that way, and even when I'm trying to work on homework my mind is elsewhere. I think I just need a break from school, but that's easier said than done because I have to be a full-time student to be on my parents' health insurance and
My parents keep saying that I need to go to a tutor, but ultimately that's not the solution... If I was working hard and didn't understand the material it would be one thing, but rather I just don't put in the time and work to understand the material, so I wouldn't even know what to ask if I did go to a tutor.
* Ughhh I owe SMJ so much money. Most of it is the shipping, as the box for the plush group auction was extremely huge and cost an insane amount by itself. D: I think I might have to ask that everyone who took part chip in a little more because it was a lot more than I expected, but I feel so guilty doing that. Once my other SMJ box comes things will be a bit better because sales and all that, but I can't help but feel that I need to cut back on collecting, and SOON. I have hardly any room in my room to begin with, so I just need to go through and weed my collection out a bit, but more importantly I need to slow way down on buying stuff. And I suck at this. I suspect that it's my obsessive/addictive gene showing itself, but I have this crazy/irrational need to have complete collections, to be impressive, to have everything that I deem adorable or beautiful or well-made. And that's just not right or healthy or even that fun.
It's not like I have to stop altogether or even anything close to that, just slow down and be more selective. I have that one item I posted about that I will pursue obsessively. I will continue to work on my Umbreon collection (which is highest priority) and Eevee and Mew plush collections. If a Larvitar plush pops up that I don't have, I'll get that, too (the chances of that are slim anyway), and I will buy the surfing Pikachu keychain from Gin when I can, but other than that... It's time to cut down to what I can afford and what I really love, instead of just packratting items for the sake of packratting them. This has gone on too long, and I need to resist temptation for once instead of just obsessively buying things and worrying about paying for them later.
* Have tons of packaging to do once I receive Box #2. TONS.
* Sleep schedule is still crazy. I was up until 4-5 AM last night, had to get up at 8 AM, and when I got home after Chemistry I watched Law & Order for a while and then took a nap. Ostensibly for an hour, but, of course, I somehow ended up sleeping from 4 PM until 11 PM instead. Again, the problem is self-control. It feels like I have none of it anymore.
* FFF I'M STILL WAY BEHIND ON COMMENTS. Want to do a friends cut because I don't feel like I have enough time to put into everyone but instead I added people because they're all totally awesome. (New people are safe, don't worry! Basically any![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-community.gif)
pkmncollectors people are safe in general, actually. And anyone who I comment with on a fairly regular basis, anyone who I've met IRL, etc.) I'm not sure who I would cut anyway, but I might go through and just do a cut sometime. :/
To counterbalance the angst a bit, I'm rather enjoying driving because it means I can blast music all the time, and theoretically I could go out and do things if I didn't feel guilty doing so because of how awful I'm doing in Chemistry. I don't like having to get gas because it seems like something that occurs far to often, but other than that, driving is good. :) I am super excited about the idea of putting bumper stickers on my car. OHHH YEAH.
I am almost certainly applying for a job at Brunswick Vet in the next few days! Every time I'm there with one of my pets they tell me I should bring in a resume, so I figure it's about time I do so. I think having a job would do me a world of good, with time management skills, money, and getting to do something I enjoy. It would just be a few hours a week probably, but still.
My birthday is coming up in just over two weeks! After that, I plan on starting my Umbreon mascot costume and that is going to be FUN. *____* I'm really excited about it.
Also, I've been drawing a little lately and that makes me happy. Must finish digital Furret drawing forpoke_arts and scan other drawings!
* Chemistry. Chemistry is going badly. I failed both the test and the lab exam miserably. I've done badly on all the quizzes. The labs have been going...sort of decent but not good either. I'm going to work as hard as I can on Chemistry over the weekend, but we have another test on Monday and I'm scared because if I fail this too, it's not good news. The material seems more manageable this time, but I'm still nervous because I don
It is so incredibly frustrating being an excellent student who suddenly feels she has no motivation to do anything... I mean, I got a B on the first semester of Chemistry (and it would have easily been an A except I worked too slowly on the final. It makes me feel so inferior, so unsuited to being a vet, and the fact that KK is doing so well makes me feel like I'm just being a burden and pitiful and a slacker when I ask for help and complain (and this is MY problem, not hers in the slightest). I don't know why I can't seem to do anything lately. It's not like doing homework is that incredibly difficult, but it feels that way, and even when I'm trying to work on homework my mind is elsewhere. I think I just need a break from school, but that's easier said than done because I have to be a full-time student to be on my parents' health insurance and
My parents keep saying that I need to go to a tutor, but ultimately that's not the solution... If I was working hard and didn't understand the material it would be one thing, but rather I just don't put in the time and work to understand the material, so I wouldn't even know what to ask if I did go to a tutor.
* Ughhh I owe SMJ so much money. Most of it is the shipping, as the box for the plush group auction was extremely huge and cost an insane amount by itself. D: I think I might have to ask that everyone who took part chip in a little more because it was a lot more than I expected, but I feel so guilty doing that. Once my other SMJ box comes things will be a bit better because sales and all that, but I can't help but feel that I need to cut back on collecting, and SOON. I have hardly any room in my room to begin with, so I just need to go through and weed my collection out a bit, but more importantly I need to slow way down on buying stuff. And I suck at this. I suspect that it's my obsessive/addictive gene showing itself, but I have this crazy/irrational need to have complete collections, to be impressive, to have everything that I deem adorable or beautiful or well-made. And that's just not right or healthy or even that fun.
It's not like I have to stop altogether or even anything close to that, just slow down and be more selective. I have that one item I posted about that I will pursue obsessively. I will continue to work on my Umbreon collection (which is highest priority) and Eevee and Mew plush collections. If a Larvitar plush pops up that I don't have, I'll get that, too (the chances of that are slim anyway), and I will buy the surfing Pikachu keychain from Gin when I can, but other than that... It's time to cut down to what I can afford and what I really love, instead of just packratting items for the sake of packratting them. This has gone on too long, and I need to resist temptation for once instead of just obsessively buying things and worrying about paying for them later.
* Have tons of packaging to do once I receive Box #2. TONS.
* Sleep schedule is still crazy. I was up until 4-5 AM last night, had to get up at 8 AM, and when I got home after Chemistry I watched Law & Order for a while and then took a nap. Ostensibly for an hour, but, of course, I somehow ended up sleeping from 4 PM until 11 PM instead. Again, the problem is self-control. It feels like I have none of it anymore.
* FFF I'M STILL WAY BEHIND ON COMMENTS. Want to do a friends cut because I don't feel like I have enough time to put into everyone but instead I added people because they're all totally awesome. (New people are safe, don't worry! Basically any
pkmncollectors people are safe in general, actually. And anyone who I comment with on a fairly regular basis, anyone who I've met IRL, etc.) I'm not sure who I would cut anyway, but I might go through and just do a cut sometime. :/To counterbalance the angst a bit, I'm rather enjoying driving because it means I can blast music all the time, and theoretically I could go out and do things if I didn't feel guilty doing so because of how awful I'm doing in Chemistry. I don't like having to get gas because it seems like something that occurs far to often, but other than that, driving is good. :) I am super excited about the idea of putting bumper stickers on my car. OHHH YEAH.
I am almost certainly applying for a job at Brunswick Vet in the next few days! Every time I'm there with one of my pets they tell me I should bring in a resume, so I figure it's about time I do so. I think having a job would do me a world of good, with time management skills, money, and getting to do something I enjoy. It would just be a few hours a week probably, but still.
My birthday is coming up in just over two weeks! After that, I plan on starting my Umbreon mascot costume and that is going to be FUN. *____* I'm really excited about it.
Also, I've been drawing a little lately and that makes me happy. Must finish digital Furret drawing for
poke_arts and scan other drawings!
