pacificpikachu | A walking contradiction (Reply)

Yep, that's me. I just plain don't make sense sometimes--especially not to myself. It's mystifying.

Anyway, today was...iffy, I guess you could say. Better than yesterday, but...that's not saying all that much.

I woke up, felt vaguely sick with nervousness again, but decided it wasn't nearly bad enough to take another day off school. So, I gathered my bags and such and headed out into the less-than-one-inch of snow.

My emotions went all "BAM!" on me (to quote a certain rather hysterical badfic) during zero period when I realized Cody, KK, and Nicole all weren't there. I knew I was being irrational, but I flipped out anyway and automatically assumed that they all OMG-ditched-school-together-and-were-having-endless-amounts-of-fun-without-me. Yes, I know that was ridiculous. But...hey, give me some credit! I'm going through a tough time, and what's going on in my head is currently contradicting itself and not making any sense. ._.;

So I angsted and listened to music and worked on my cat drawing during first period. It was a *little* bit of a cheer-up that I got a bunch of compliments on it, and it was even more of a *little* bit of a cheer-up when Mr. Baxter said I was doing absolutely excellent work this year, and that I should be proud. Mr. Baxter doesn't lay on random compliments for no reason, so that made me feel marginally better.

Government was...also semi-decent, barring the fact that I always go into serious wangst mode when in Government class (probably because it requires no thought, and therefore I am free to think about whatever I wish--which in this emotional state, is not a good thing). Sara (a nice girl in the class who sits in front of me) and I signed up to do a presentation on the Death Penalty (which means we got the coolest topic in the class. Most of the other ones were really vague, boring ones), and then just casually chatted for a few minutes.

Ha--I didn't have to do anything in PE 'cause I got a note from Dad saying I'm recovering from the flu. Which is pretty much true. So, I sat around and watched people run laps and proceeded to draw in my sketchbook. Another Pikachu. Again. XD;; Though this one is from behind and only takes up about 1/100th of the picture, as the majority of the picture is a land/skyscape. It's sort of a...bizarre commentary on my feelings. Somehow. Y'know, if you tilt your head and squint...or if you're just delusional like me. XD;;

At lunch, I discovered Cody was at school after all (alarm difficulties, apparently) and KK and Nicole were off on a field trip with Cartan, so a bit of my burden was lifted. And that big hug really, really helped. ^_^ Cody also decided to put my stale Lucky Charms on his ramen and eat it. O_o; Erk--ew. XD; Zoe and I spent quite a while discussing which anime would make the weirdest musicals. We decided Evangelion, FLCL, Berserk, and Hellsing would all make rather interesting musicals. Also: Totoro: The Heavy Metal Musical. Or: Kiki's Delivery Service: The Punk Rock Musical. Oh, and we apparently got someone in Anime Club totally addicted to Densha Otoko. He's seen more than me! That's exciting.

I continued to work on the cat picture and listen to music during fifth period, though I was supposed to be participating in the critique. I think Makayla and I talked, but again I don't remember what the topic was. I know part of it was regarding the Naruto and Bleach musicals, but... OH! Makayla got Tony addicted to Absolute Boyfriend. Hahahaha. I can't get over that--it's so funny. Tony and Ultimate Boyfriend might be one of the most unexpected mixes I can think of.

Sixth period...we took this huuuge poetic devices quiz. I think I did decently, despite (because I wasn't at school yesterday) the fact that it was basically a pop quiz for me. ._.; Rebecca--the girl whose paper I graded--kept complaining that she got things wrong. The class was rather boistrous about their feelings on the quiz. XD;;

Seeing as none of my friends in Anatomy were there for seventh period (Cody had a tennis match), I headed off the art room, where I mostly worked on my cat picture, but also interjected occasionally into a pretty funny conversation taking place between Mr. Baxter, Sean, Luke, and Tobey. I felt proud of myself for making snarky comments at the right times--normally, I can only think of witty things to say about two days after a conversation has taken place. I turned on the second Arjuna OST on the art room CD player and listened to that while all this was going on, too.

After school, I ate a pasty (mmm), and then had to go to the dentist. :X This wasn't so bad, though, seeing as I refuse to let him clean my teeth with that nasty gravelly stuff, he pretty much just pokes and scrapes around in my mouth. To tell the truth, the worst part of the whole ordeal was that my reading of Newsweek in the waiting room was interrupted. ;_; I love Newsweek and Time...and it's a terrible, horrible thing to bring me away from them!

We did errands for a while (Ryan got majorly peeved at me for not letting him sit in the front seat, and then peeved again when Mom bought me an Italian soda but didn't buy him one because he was whining), then headed home.

Not much happened for the first few hours of being home--shower, cleaning the cat litter, Solitaire, and other such excitement... Eventually I got some courage up and gave Cody a call, so we could chat a bit. He was talking with his sister and said he'd call back later. When he did, we...ended up having a pretty darn emotional conversation, but at least we got some things out in the open that needed to be discussed. Because I'm not making much sense, I'm causing him almost as much confusion as I'm facing myself... Darn, this is hard. I am feeling a bit better since we talked, though, even if it was a little bit of a rough conversation.

Well, it's bedtime and I'm trying my best not to read the vastly amusing articles off of capalert.com and/or discuss Wolf's Rain with